On my way back from a Friend’s Birthday Party when my car stopped at the signal, I found a poor girl in a very piteous & wretched state seeking alms. I took out some amount & was about to hand it over to my nephew to make the donation when suddenly my logic took precedence. I thought that if I donated money, it would be like contributing to her sordid state of affairs by promoting/supporting her to beg instead of encouraging her to fetch a living for herself. So I stopped myself but on observing the poor girl keenly, I realized she was hardly old enough to know the different sources through which she can fend for herself. To know what is right or wrong or to know what can be done to earn a decent living when all she knew was that her parents had been doing the same. And in any case, does that make her needs any way lesser than my own kids’ who don’t settle for anything less than KFC or Pizza Hut in stark contrast, the poor child on the signal had hardly any clothes to cover her body. Is it her fault that she wasn’t taught to fend for herself or she couldn’t make a decent living on her own at this tender age when usually kids go to convent schools & are busy with their Play stations & Ipods. Is it not morally binding on us, the privileged people of society, to provide them with whatever support or assistance that we could?

My car zoomed past the signal & I was lost in my thoughts & felt sorry that I couldn’t contribute in my little way to better her state of affairs. Many thoughts were hitting my mind at the same time. I was also wondering how much help these little contributions would be. It’s possible that these small, one time donations would not help them a big deal in long run but can indeed address some of their urgent needs. It may rather be more strategic & effective to pick on a set of people, whom we could guide/help in setting up & getting started with something with which they can fend for themselves on a permanent, basis. This may require some effort & homework on our part but if not that, then at least are we not capable of contributing & donating some money, which can indeed address some of their immediate basic needs. All these thoughts hit my mind at the same time & I started questioning my trite logic. The same logic of not giving alms to address their basic & urgent needs & thinking I would be promoting begging if I made a donation, which now looked weird, impractical & after all not so logical.

Just then I realized that I was on my way back on the same road & saw the poor girl counting her coins with a grumbled look on her face. My face twinkled at the thought of adding to her count & may be able to change her frown to a smile. I took out a decent amount & handed it over to her, after which I could see the grimace on her face transformed into a grin. She got ecstatic & started waving at my car fervently. I can never forget the excitement on her face when she went to her mother nearby & showed her big collection. My heart ached that the same amount that I expend over the luxuries like KFC Chicken Grill, Cheese Franky & expensive Baskin Robin’s Mango Scoops is indeed her family's bare earnings for a day, maybe their family’s food expenses for the day. Buying branded levis or Allen Solly for thousands rather than lesser-known brands is not a big deal for me but I think ten times before donating hundreds to a needy one. I wonder why I never felt guilty about this. Maybe I was too busy achieving my selfish goals than worrying about others who need our help. I also realized that the happiness that I get from hanging out at my favourite food joints or buying a branded name pales in comparison to the one I get after capturing a smile on an indigent face after helping them in any which way I can. When we strike a balance between expending & extravagance, we can indeed not only touch but also change lives.

ADP & ESITT may take upon various countless CSR initiatives, but are we not missing an opportunity to make the difference at grass root levels by making a shift in thinking patterns. Can we not make a huge difference by making a small paradigm shift in our luxurious lifestyle to adopt more modesty in our lives & thus make that big difference in other's lives? Why do we see Ambani’s gifting Yachts on Page 1 & poor parents abandoning their only child owing to penury on Page 2? Are we doing our bit to change this trend of society?

It's true that many of us snub our own urge to do many great things, things for ourselves, for others, for society & people in general in our day to day lives. Did we just not brush aside the thought saying that it may be difficult for us to do anything lest we ourselves achieve something in life? It's certainly true in my case when all along I was thinking along these lines that I could do something stellar for the society only after I attain certain status & position in life for myself. But one day I asked myself how would I be in that position to help others, when would I feel I have achieved enough to start thinking of facilitating/supporting others who are in more dire needs compared to our own fancy indulgences. When would I actually reach a point where I can not only think of myself but also about others well being? We may say it is our long-term goal to help others, but in life, goals have to be achieved not just set, as we never know when life suddenly deserts us or what the future has in store for us. At that point of time, we may only have ourselves to blame & far too many reasons justifying our state of affairs. But deep down in our hearts, we know that we withheld all of these thoughts to ourselves, as we hardly gave this a serious thought. Again, we can just make a thinking shift in our minds & make a difference.

The thinking shift I refer to is :

1. Believing that only by changing our outlook and our lifestyle by a trifle we can bring about the utmost important radical change we need in society. It’s time for us to realize that the extra bucks spent by each one of us on these so-called high profile brands are not at all justifiable when a poor kid down the lane doesn’t have the means of getting himself enough to cover his whole body or fight the freezing cold or take shelter in the pouring rain. Why don’t I feel guilty when I wear a 2000 bucks watch on my hand, but won’t use that same hand to hand over 20 bucks to that handicapped beggar. In fact, I conveniently justify it by reassuring myself that by not giving him anything I am igniting in him a sense of need to work to earn. I don’t really take the time to think, even if he wants to, Is he capable of doing that? Will he be able to do that? Are there enough resources for him to search for a livelihood? Can I help them in any way by showing them the best alternate path & guiding them to a more lucrative option than begging?

2. This brings us to the second important issue of creating opportunities for the destitute. I think there are enough NGOs already working who are to be commended for their work and effort. There are scores of people who wish to donate, but many fail to find a trustworthy service. I think, we can do a great deal of good, if we club with an NGO and start taking up localities or small villages and seeing to it that, not a single member of that locality or village is unemployed, then we can win the trust of scores of potential donors. Think of an area – a village, a locality in a city or an entire city, which is absolutely free from beggars and destitute.  And do you think it’s that big a deal or that difficult a task to accomplish? With a sizable cut down in our splurging and little voluntary contribution, I am more than certain that this goal can be realized sooner than expected. We all know and have experienced that humanity is not dead, only that maybe it has taken a backseat for some, as some people do not find a trustworthy channel for contribution and some are genuinely too busy to think of all this. Maybe this is high time we brainstorm on all these issues to ignite the sense of urgency & need for these selflessness activities in our life so that when we look back we find our life filled with contentment, satisfaction & blessings.

There is some strange way we operate in our day to day lives. We tend to keep the charity & CSR activities one time off & then proceed with our own fancy & indulgent lifestyle, which may be the real motive of CSR efforts. We should indeed derive gratification by splurging some money in whatever way we want, as it is our right to do so & of course our hard-earned money. But alongside we can judiciously plan things such that helping or facilitating the needy become a daily part of our lives.

For example, on our last visit to Blind school, one of the children questioned us as to why we didn’t have dinner along with them (though we served them dinner).  Before we could reply, his friend replied that it is because we are big people & we don’t eat with them as the food & place doesn’t match up to our standards & is not proper for us. I was shocked & this triggered a set of questions in my mind.  Though we may have different reasons for not eating with them, they felt that they were no more than a charity case for us. Then one day when someone told me that they wanted to celebrate their son’s Birthday Party in the Blind School, I started thinking hard. Why don’t I visit such people and places as often as I would visit some of my friends?  I thought that this might be the real essence of our visits. We should be able to combine our life with their life in order to be able to feel & make a difference instead of formal visits. This will also ensure that our children & youth understand the privileges, which they enjoy & take for granted. Only by witnessing the absence of these in others' life they would be able to appreciate its existence in their own lives & would also understand the pain & misery of the needy which will propel them to adopt measures to better their situation.

Since we know it very well that such needy people deserve more care & attention than any other set of people we meet, hence the time spent with them would be most worthful & fulfilling. As these People can’t help themselves, It becomes our duty to provide them with guidance & support to make them self-sufficient. In fact, just visiting such places or giving alms to beggars wouldn’t fetch us something substantial unless we think of a permanent solution, wherein we have some set up to provide them with some formal training, skills, work, decent wages that would make them independent & also detest begging. We can collaborate with any NGO’s to adopt such changes & make a difference. We can also form a group for each locality & target to find the right habitat & occupation for these destitute beggars which can be various orphanages, old age homes, etc., to eradicate begging & also ‘Beggar menace’ as some people prefer to term it.

If this is farfetched, we could at least make sure that we cut down on only some of our luxuries & channel these towards a good social cause on a permanent basis. We can just pick up a school or person or home that we can build up & support on a regular basis. If each one of us does this, we will build up many happy homes & happy society. So, if you thought we could do less, think again. It’s all of us who shape our future for ourselves & can grab the opportunity to shape the future for some deserving people which will, in turn, give us immense satisfaction & joy. Each person can make a big difference in his or her own way. Just the passion & the spark is all that is required & it just needs a strong trigger point & the zeal to carry forward your thoughts & ideas. Who knows, maybe the heartfelt blessings of these needy people will wither away all your troubles & tread you along the path of success in life.

Its all in the thoughts & if we can alter our thought process & also of other members around us, then without us realizing we would be setting up momentum for building up many of the worthy lives around us by means of small slashes in our luxurious life. It’s ironic that by just adopting some modesty in our luxurious lifestyle we can actually better the lives of many. We can make a huge impact by changing their lives to make it a better one. It’s we who constitute the urban literate world & if not we then who will be the ones to look after these people, who are potential bright citizens of tomorrow. Is it not humanity that ties us up with such people & are we not responsible towards them?

Do put your thinking cap on & start thinking of ways to put your ten cents towards your fellow beings & society in which you live. All of us are blessed with great minds & ideas & together we will reignite the subdued passion that all of us have to change this world & society to make it a better place to live in & to make not only ours but also other's dream come true.